Let IT… NO!

This winter has been, thus far anyway, one ofthe coldest I can remember. Ah, what happened to those glorious days of 60 degrees and sun.

Before I continue though, I should acknowledge the wildfires in Los Angeles that are happening as I write this. I’m sure I know people who are out there, and I can only hope and pray that they and everyone else are all right. The loss has already been incalculable, unfortunately including some lives. I hope some kind of rain or cold will come soon to help put the fires out.

Here in North Carolina, we had our first brush with measurable snow since January 29th, 2022. Of course the drumbeat starts days before its arrival: excitable news reporters whipping themselves and in turn the public to a frenzy. “If it shifts a little south…” “will likely start around 4 PM on Friday…” “dangerous ice mixed in…”

As the appointed time arrived, my wife lined up with all the other Southerners to acqure the essentials: bread, milk, and toilet paper. Our Northern immigrants (yes y’all, we are our own country here,) shook their heads, bemused. They know they’re still cold though, they just don’t wanna admit it. And we don’t have the requisite equipment to continue normal functioning when a couple inches of “the white stuff” sweeps through town. I still do pick on our silliness, even if I understand it.

As I grudgingly rolled out of the blankets on Friday at 5 AM, I scraped the networks for answers as to whether I should venture out to work. These late-arriving storms are the hardest to predict, but since nothing I saw indicated that it would start prior to my 4 PM quitting time and 5 PM return home I decided I should go in. Once, back in 2014, I got stuck on a Durham city bus as over six inches of snow fell in a half hour while trying to return from work early. If not for a kind passenger ensuring I got home and more importantly to my door that could have ended badly. So I do not make this decision lightly.

Work was work, I spent this past week taking a new trainee on a crash course through JAWS to help prepare her for a position. It’s rewarding work, but let’s just say it also led to some good sleep.

As I stepped from the building, I was dismayed but not entirely surprised to feel drops of freezing rain hitting my hands. I was just hoping the GoTriangle paratransit vehicle I would be on would ferry me safely home, and then get the driver safely back to wherever they put them. I think I did feel us slide a little bit, but otherwise all was well and I got home quickly for a Friday. I suppose enough people heeded the warnings “WRAL Weather Alert Day!” our main local news channel intoned, to keep traffic fairrly light.

And now on Sunday, a little bit of that cabin fever is starting to set in. The good thing, I guess, is I can sit in my room and absorb lots of sunshine from my window. How many days till Spring?

2025: A Quarter

There was an old (because most of the things I think of are old) country song where she says her momma gave her “a penny for your thoughts, a quarter for your calls…”. That and the fact that we are now into the 25th year of this century and millenium inspired this entry’s title.

I know some of you remember entering the year 2000, all those years ago. My most prominent thoughts from then, as I stood in a cramped church fellowship hall and the clock struck 12 were “I wonder if the TV and power are going to just shut off” (Y2K, look it up if you are too young to recall) and “I wish I could talk!” I’d been struck by a horrible head cold that had also taken my voice.

Anyhow, here we are all this time, with smarter phones and… well you can guess the rest. This past year was the first that felt like some semblance of normal since Covid arrived, though I am very much aware that this ss still not the case for everyone. I was fortunate enough to visit Myrtle Beach twice, and to fly to D.C. as Employee of the Year! (I wish I’d finished writing about that. I enjoyed delicious meals and (blah hearing aside) remember some of the fun of diing out. And work continues to hum along, with its new experiences and opportunities to help others come up.

But as always my favorite thing is reading. This year I set an all-time books-read record with 87 titles consumed. Granted GoodReads says that each book was on average 10 pages shorter than in 2023, but I still read more pages by far in 24 as well. And as I did for 2023, I will include a list of my five-star reads. If you don’t plan to look, you can stop here and I will wish you and us all a happy new year.

  • The Boys In The Boat, by Daniel James Brown
  • Somewhere Inside, by Laura Ling
  • All The Sinners Bleed, by S.A. Cosby
  • The House of Eve, by Sadeqa Johnson
  • Thicker Than Water, by Kerry Washington
  • The New Guys, by Meredith Bagby
  • The Women, by Kristin Hannah
  • The Last Lifeboat, by Hazel Gaynor
  • The Familiar, by Leigh Bardugo
  • Noumenon Infinity, by Marina J. Lostetter
  • A History of Burning, by Janika Oza
  • Shelterwood, by Lisa Wingate
  • Mornings in Jenin, by Susan Abulhawa
  • A Calamity of Souls, by David Baldacci
  • The Uncharted Flight of Olivia West, by Sara Ackerman
  • James, by Percival Everett
  • The Book of Lost Names, by Kristin Harley
  • Dust Child, by Nguyen Phan Que Mai
  • By Any Other Name, by Jodi Picoult
  • Eruption, by Michael Crichton
  • A Pair of Wings, by Carole Hopson
  • The Warm Hands of Ghosts, by Katherine Arden
  • The Berry Pickers, by Amanda Peters
  • Lovely One, by Ketanji Brown Jackson
  • The Deaf Girl, by Abigail Heringer
  • The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue, by Victoria E. Schwab

Gifts, Unwrapped

And we have reached that time of year, the period for which I save to take time off work and get in some much-needed relaxation. So my vacation began on the 20th and will last till January 2nd as we aspirationally start 2025.

The first thing that happened, after our Friday holiday party, was our early dismissal at 3 instead of the usual quitting time of 4 PM. Those who work in manufacturing at my employer actually leave at 3:20, so figuring there might be a glut of people using our GoTriangle Access Paratransit service, I opted to summon a Lyft car. My driver spoke no English, which was immediately clear to me as I entered the vehicle and he didn’t respond to my initial statement and was using his GPS in Spanish. I was ok with this, except for the logistical challenge of ensuring I had arrived at the correct address. But never fear, I used basic high school spanish to convey my address’s exact numbers and we both had a laugh. It later occurred to me that I could have used my phone’s translation app. He was courteous though, waiting to see if I got inside and declining a cell phone call while driving.

I enjoyed that extra hour as a cold Friday unfolded and relief filled me at the time stretching ahead. My next task? Find a couple of good books to accompany my wife and me as we took our Christmas to Myrtle Beach to celebrate ten years since our relationship basically began. Well it’s actually part of our complicated story, one that involves an overlapping circle of friends who saw that we might connect given our similar temperaments. I’m sure I wrote about it in those early entries of 2015.

Anyhow, the two books I settled on after much deliberation were Playground, by Richard Powers, and Katharine, the Wright Sister, by Tracy Enerson. The former is sort of complex even to me, but it talks a lot about the ocean, colonization of so-called French Polynesia, and some sort of “floating city” the Americans want to build. It’s decent. The latter is an attempt to Chronicle the role the Wright sister played in getting her famous brothers off the ground. It flits between three first-person perspectives, Kate’s, Orville’s, and Wilbur’s. It’s riveting.

So after a quick jaunt to pass out and receive gifts from her folks on Saturday, we laid about on Sunday then headed for the beach on Monday. This time we opted to stay in a new (to us) property. I often find it interesting how so many of these hotels choose names meant to evoke faraway places: Tropical Seas, Coral Beach Resort, and our hotel, the Paradise Resort . We pulled in and arrived at the oceanfront king 1-bedroom suite as a cold, rainy wind blew in off the Atlantic. We were completely fine with this though, as it brought back fond memories of our trip down to Myrtle following our January 2018 wedding.

We took a couple of walks down there: a frigid one on Tuesday and a slightly warmer one on Christmas Day. She joked that this constitutes her anual “Christmas-day 5K” but she chopped it up so I could hang. Ha, well truth be told I ain’t no walker. In fact on Wednesday, my apple watch kept tapping my wrist to ask if I was doing a workout, probably to make sure nothing off was happening as my heart rate accelerated. I definitely need to exercise more. Maybe that’ll happen in 2025. Says about half the country.

So didn’t I earn the food we ate there? There was the Olive Garden, where I always get their spagheti and Italian sausage, alwayswith angel hair pasta. And then there wasPaula Deen’s Family Kitchen, a restaurant we found in Myrtle in 2018 and have visited every other time we’ve gone down there. Let’s just say you don’t go there to eat sallads. I had meatloaf, fried okra, and a mac and cheese that had been improved since I had last gone in May.

The only other noteworthy thing we did there was to exchange our own gifts. She got me a comfortable robe to drape over myself on these cold days that feels like a blanket. For my gift, I got her the Usher Confessions 20th Anniversary vinyl. “I know you didn’t spend $200 on this!” she said as she extracted it from the box. The joke was that we had been trying to get Confessions on vinyl from Amazon for some time but could not find it for less than that. I decided to just plug it in and see if I lucked up, knowing it was something she wanted and would enjoy. For the record (get it, record?) no I did not spend 200 bucks to acquire that. They’d only just released the 20th anniversary version.

So all in all we had and are having a good time. Hopefully I’ll be prepared for whatever the next year brings. At the least I hope it brings us all full hearts, full wallets, and whatever else we desire.

NIB 2024: A Day of Relaxation

Ah, I meant to chronicle the rest of my time at the NIB 2024 Training Conference and Expo more quickly than I have, but alas work, cooler weather, and reading have interfered with my writing. (I’m already about to set a new record for books read [and listened to] in a year, as the old one is 79 and I’m already at 76). Anyhow, I wanted to capture at least one more day of attendance before it all becomes too distant in my ever-aging memory.

Wednesday, October 16: The day dawned crisp and cold. Most times I’ve visited our nation’s capital, the weather fluctuated crazily with temps in the 80s in the afternoon and snow at night. Granted those visits usually occurred in May, whereas October weather is more uniformly dreary. But the sun was actually out on this day as we meandered out of the hotel and across the busy street to a two-story McDonald’s. We don’t have many two-story restaurants here in North Carolina, but I guess you see them more in places where space is a premium.

I had a sausage, egg, and cheese McMuffin, while my wife probably ate a McGriddle (she likes sweet, I do savory). As we ate, she noted that there were some homeless individuals using the space probably to stay warm. I’ve also noticed that, sadly, that city seems to have a high population of unhoused individuals, perhaps because there are more services available? It’s an interesting question. Anyhow, she said there are signs that specifically say “No Loitering,” so if one wishes to remain for an extended time they must either buy food or devise other strategies to make themselves look occupied. I just hope we as a society keep moving in a direction where people will have fewer of these challenges, because the systems will work as they should.

Food consumed, we went to a little store to get snacks for later. I had a giant cup of grapes, because hey grapes are good for the brain. Back in the hotel, we milled about in the lobby for a while then decided to head down to the basement area to see what was going on in the conference. I then realized that I had missed the technology demo that was put on for the employees of the year, because at that time the app I was using to keep up with events was not sending notifications out. This was ok though, as I got to check out some of these devices in the exhibit hall. I’m always fascinated by what they have in these places, but also overwhelmed by the people pulsing from every nook and cranny. My wife had to keep me grounded and inside of the place. I held and listened to the Envision smart glasses speak. Those are nice and built specifically for blind folk, but at $2,000 I probably won’t be getting a pair. The Meta Ray-ban glasses are a likelier candidate, though I might just hold out and wait for a competitor as that market is now starting to come alive. Many of my trainees at work really want me to acquire those though, so I can show them how to use them.

Anyhow, I also checked out a Freedom Scientific workstation, equipped with a computer running JAWS for Windows and, more interestingly to me, a Focus 40 Braille Display. This is another device some of my trainees would like me to get for demonstrations, but alas. It had a whole lot of buttons and switches, and it is powered by a Perkins-style braille keyboard as opposed to my Mantis QWERTY device. I prefer the latter for writing, but the Focus does have many features that could make it desirable.

After checking those out, my wife and I decided to do a whole lot of, welll… nothing. Hey, one of the rewards of this trip was to be able to relax if one wished, and how often do you get to crawl back into bed and sleep on Wednesday afternoon. It was glorious, but I just wish I had drank more water as I tend to dehydrate easily if I do not and paid for this lacking later. Fortunately I was ok.

At about 5, we opted for another fine-dining experience and one we can no longer get in our area, and ventured to McCormick and Schmick’s. We had visited this chain in Raleigh for our “halfversary” after the first six months of marriage and fallen in love with it, at which point they took it away in favor of a Mexican restaurant. So we said whenever we got to a city with that establishment we would check it out again. Arlington did have a location.

This time, I ate some kind of salmon and mashed potatoes. It was delicious, if a little expensive. And as was the case in Raleigh, I loved the ambience of the place as it wasn’t too loud and we could easily have a conversation.

Before getting a Lyft back to our hotel, we walked around that area a bit exploring some of the ice cream shops and stores they had. You could tell we were in a different city, though of course it still had nowhere near the hustle of a New York or Philadelphia. I enjoyed the feeling.

And that was the crux of Wednesday, the midpoint of our trip. A little learning and a lot of rest. We sure needed that rest for Thursday’s tours, coming up in next post.

NIB 2024: First General Session, and Good Eatin’!

The FDR statue. He’s sitting in a wheelchair. There were braille plaques nearby, too.

So, this is what happens when I am left to pack.

Tuesday October 15 dawned cold and blustery, as we knew it would. My wife had stacked sweaters on my couch that were to accompany my dress outfits so that I could stay at least minimally warm, but of course I didn’t notice they were there. This meant all I had was my sturdy jacket, which doesn’t always make the best dressing piece, comfortable as it is. So we needed to make a store run.

but first, we had to get ready. The bathroom in our room, and I presume throughout the hotel, was designed oddly. The showers had no curtains, only a half pane of glass that seemed to allow water to wet the floor more easily, and the head was of the rainwater variety, coming down from straight above. The bed was decent enough, but well let’s just say we have exacting standards about pillows that are rarely met in hotels.

These things were ok though and certainly did not cause a high degree of displeasure. Once dressed, we made our way down to the teeming ballroom for a light breakfast of yogurt with granola and peaches among other things (pretty good) and an empanada with egg and sausage. Then we made a quick trip back to the room to grab everything we needed before shoving off for Target.

I used the Lyft app to get around during this trip, and I was amazed by how accurate the locations were. For instance, it could tell me that we were standing inside of the Hyatt Regency Crystal City, of course, but it also pinpointed exactly which storefront we were in while waiting for our return ride. That kind of exactness would help blind folks more easily navigate, I would think.

In the store, we joked that we were exploring by doing something we could just as easily have done while in North Carolina. But that’s the truth, perhaps sadly: almost all of the world is now a big chain. Local stuff does exist, but it’s becoming increasingly harder to find.

We quickly found two nice, relatively inexpensive and versatile sweaters, then made our way to a Barnes and Noble to await said return ride. What I hadn’t known, because I wasn’t looking as it happened, was that Lyft had switched my car because a closer driver was available. This caused some confusion as a ride that looked nothing like expected pulled to a stop in front of us, but the driver called me on the phone to clarify and my wife could hear my voice coming through the window. So we felt ok about hopping in.

Back at the hotel, we opted for another meal at Cinnabar. This time, I chose a cheeseburger. It was ok, but didn’t come with any sauce or have a whole lot going on in the way of toppings. I had some mayo added, and thus managed to consume a fair amount of it with fries that were different from those we had on Monday. Then we briefly ran to the room for some R&R and to grab whatever we needed before the main event, the general session.

The ballroom was again teeming, with nearly every chair occupied. We’d located spots kind of far back from the speakers, so I could hear decently but maybe not well. This would definitely be a theme throughout my experience, unfortunately, due to my own issues and not anything conference-related. The session itself was interesting: the usual pageantry that accompanies such events. I listened with some interest as they talked about some of NIB’s achievements, especially as relates to helping those of us who are blind experience greater upward mobility. These metrics have definitely improved, and I am, I hope, an example of that.

What I most enjoyed though was the hearty reactions that went into celebrating employees of the year. It boosts morale among the workers, making us feel like what we’re doing matters. And it certainly matters in creating more jobs for blind folks in a way that is or can be transferable to the mainstream as attitudes towards disability improve. The session was supposed to be done by 4, but it actually lasted closer to 4:30 as a long discussion continued on areas that were slightly above my head.

Then the elevator madness ensued. This was another theme, especially as not all of the hotel’s elevators were working the entire time. They slowly brought more and more of them online, but until then massive lines and surges dominated. When we did wrangle a spot, we still had to wait as stops were made at nearly every floor.

After another brief respite in our room, we headed back down to the lobby around 5:30 to have dinner at Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse. First though, we had to work out how we’d get there. The two of us LCI employees who had won Employee of the Year, our guests, and the higher-ups who had come to the conference as well were to be treated to a delicious meal at this pricey restaurant. The Arlington, Va. location was only about a half mile away, but given that it was already darkening and cold out, we summoned two Ubers and made the short ride over.

Into another elevator and up to the 11th floor of some sort of office building where the restaurant was housed. My wife said it gave a great view of planes landing and taking off from Regan. Though we ate in a private room, it was so buzzing with activity that I could, again, barely hear anything. Yup, same as always. But the food was good though. I had stuffed chicken, with cheese and a sauce of some sort. It was definitely filling. I also consumed a glass of wine along with some water, because why not? I mostly just took it all in and reflected on the significance of even being part of such an occurrrence.

And that was all for Tuesday. More in our next entry.

NIB 2024: Arrival

Me standing near the Washington Monument and Reflecting Pool

And so it begins… This year, as I’ve noted, I had been invited to attend the annual conference of the National Industries for the Blind in Arlington, Virginia, as LCI had awarded me Employee of the Year. Well one of them, another individual with whom I’d actually done some training as it happens, also received the designation. I was allowed to bring a guest, so my wife came with me.

The good news for us is we didn’t have to leave super early. Our American Airlines flight from Raleigh/Durham International Airport to Regan National Airport didn’t depart until Monday October 14 at 10:45 AM. Having prepaid for parking the night before, we loaded the car with bags packed to the gills for our weeklong trip and headed to the Economy lot. A shuttle arrived shortly after 8:00 AM and took us to the terminal, where we then had to hoof it with those heavy bags and I was sucking air by the time we reached the check-in counter.

“Would you two like to each check one of those bags for free?” The woman behind the counter asked. I have never been so relieved to hear anything in my life. My newly acquired briefcase (I had to look businesslike, time to shed the backpack) felt light by comparison as we continued onto the security checkpoint. This was my first time flying since… well, 2020, and one thing I’d forgotten was how annoying this process could be. Or maybe my patience has just shortened over the last four years. It was belts off, shoes off, Mantis braille display out, iPhone out, and oh I forgot to take off the Apple Watch. Oh, well. They did two inspections of my stuff, having a little trouble unsurprisingly working out exactly what the Mantis might in fact be. It looks like a computer keyboard, but… where’s the screen! They also had to dust my hands I guess to see if I might have some kind of residue on them.

Anyhow, once I put myself back together again we made our way to the coffee line as my wife got a free one with the parking reservation and I wanted some in preparation for a long day.

The rest of the wait was fairly uneventful, nearly 2 hours because hey it’s better to be early than late. I thought someone else from my employer would show up, but as we sat there in the terminal no one did.

“Now boarding American Airlines Flight 5545, with service to Washington Regan Airport.” We make our way to the line for preboarding, as usual, and my wife tells the gate agent I am blind as they initially say we are not eligible to board yet. We are on an extremely narrow-body Regional Jet, so have to just about turn sidwways to make our way to seats way back on row 20. I learned something new about airplane seat configuration, too: when I first saw our tickets, I noticed it said 20A and 20c.

“Wait, someone’s gonna be sitting in between us?” I thought. But no, there are no middle seats on this aircraft. So I assume any window and aisle seats will be A and C, and F and D respectively. The middles, if there, will be B and E. Interesting stuff, if you’re a nerd like I am.

We took off pretty much on time, shortly before 11 AM, and had barely completed our climb before we began descending. We mostly just sat there and made small talk, as you really didn’t even have time to get anything out. I suppose even with those security hassles, getting there that quickly still beats driving.

As it turns out, one other person from LCI was aboard but he couldn’t catch us before we got to our seats. He did get an Uber for us all and we piled in to make the short jaunt to the Hyatt Regency Crystal City, which is an airport hotel. It took them only a few minutes to get our room ready, so we ventured up in the ear-popping elevator to the 17th floor to deposit our luggage.

Flying, even a short distance, tends to make one hungry. So the next thing we did was locate the hotel’s featured restaurant, Cinnabar. I’m not really sure why it was called Cinnabar, as it is a full-service, sit-down restaurant. Their food was delicious but expensive. I had a chicken sandwich with cheese, mayo, and tomatoes. I guess I ate too many of the fries though, as my wife regularly chides me for doing, because I couldn’t finish that entire fairly large sandwich.

Not much else happened prior to dinner. We went and officially checked into the NIB Training Conference and Expo, collecting our lanyards and my Employee of the Year swag. We also had to attend an Employee of the Year orientation at 3, where we discovered how many of us there were (like 70 people). I was excited, but parts of me became overwhelmed quickly because of my hearing problems among such large crowds.

And speaking of crowds, prior to dinner we dropped in on the Welcome Reception. This was open to all conference attendees, and it sounded like one full-on roar as we huddled in the hotel’s basement-level vault. I stood in a corner and sipped on a Corona, feeling nice and reflecting on how I got here.

And finally, there was dinner. It was a simple affair, served buffet-style, with chicken, broccoli, and potatoes. There was supposed to be a Murder Mystery presented along with our meals, and I think it did happen later, but it took them a little while to get everything together. This is because it was to involve the audience in some kind of who-dun-it, where they acted out parts based on their role in the so-called murder. My wife and I didn’t stay to hear that part though, as the day and all its activities had caught up with us. We again rode that elevator into the sky, headed into our room, and called it a night.

More in Tuesday’s post, including a description of the room and some of its features.

I Can Hear Clearly Now, Sort Of: On that Hearing Test

So this past Wednesday, I toddled off somewhat unwillingly to my audiologist’s office for the pending hearing test. As I noted in the previous entry, I knew I needed this checkup as my role calls for me to be able to hear in more and varied situations and to work with individuals one-on-one and in groups.

The last audiogram (that’s the technical word for them) I had was in 2018, but I barely remember that. I think I intentionally block them out. I should probably call them audiograms more often anyway, as the word “test” connotes academics, and the feeling that I am not doing as well as I would like can make me feel a little bit of that failure feeling. The last audiogram I recorded in this journal was in 2016, and can likely be found under the “Hearing” tag.

I sat in the booth with a different audiologist and, I guess, her student who was doing most of the work while under supervision. First, they checked my ears to see if there had been any wax accumulation, but she said apparently I’m doing a pretty good job of keeping that at bay. I’ve learned some lessons after my much-documented challenges keeping hearing aids going as they constantly filled up with the annoying stuff.

“How long is this going to take, approximately,” I asked.

“It should take no more than 20 minutes” she replied. 20 minutes? It felt like an hour easy!

This test was different than the one I recalled from 2016. First, they had a recorded male voice reading back the words. They start to become predictable to some extent, or at least they make us think they are, as they say “Baseball,” “Airplane,” “Northwest,” and the like over and over again. And of course they test each ear, sometimes playing white noise or a wind sound in the other ear. Another, very real challenge I experienced was shutting down my inner thoughts: dinner, sleep, work the next day, etc.

One of the words that kind of caused me to laugh… it sounded like he said “Say the word Bi*ch”. Hmmm, I’m pretty sure he didn’t say that, I thought. “Ditch?” I tried tentatively. Probably… not that either. Ah, well.

I then had to get the beep test. I think I actually did better on this part, and especially when they put on the big clunky things that kind of fasten to your head as honestly I could often feel the beep more than hear it. We laughed though when at the end of the test she said something to me and my hand shot up as if I’d heard a beep again. “Sorry, you just get conditioned to do that’” I said.

“I understand,” she replied.

The results were a little worse than the last time. She said something like my word discrimination dropped from 80 to 55% in my left ear, and my right ear remained profoundly deaf as it has been for some time. “It’s probably time for you to consider a cochlear implant, especially on that right side” she said. “And as your left-side clarity diminishes”. I have noticed that this has happened, for sure, as my Norrie Disease-related progressive hearing loss keeps progressing. A little disheartening, but such is the way I guess. I just don’t know about CI’s, because I’ve heard all sorts of stories about them. There is a possibility that it might not work, and I think you don’t really have a way to fall back if they don’t. But I know that time is likely coming more quickly than I would like.

Meanwhile, she went ahead and made adjustments to the aids as a result of the tests. And they’re kind of a mixed bag. Sports sound a lot better, and I was much more able to hear my supervisor and trainee today at work. But I am still kind of working to adjust to my wife’s voice and others, as the sound while turned up is also somewhat muffled. I think I’m getting there though and will just have to be patient, while hoping others are patient with me. The paratransit vehicle I take to and from work also sounded really loud for the first few days, but that is starting to calm down as well.

So yeah, this issue is always going to be complicated. But ultimately I am grateful to those folks and their good work of really getting the aids to work for my needs. I still haven’t tried them in the holy grail of hearing, the restaurant, but I’m sure that is coming soon. That will really tell me if a difference has been made. And even more the National Industries for the Blind conference I will be attending in three weeks as a result of winning Employee of the Year. I’ll keep you posted, and I mostly write about this to help parents of children with Norrie gain some insight into what this experience might be like, again realizing that my voice does not represent everyone’s. I do hope it helps.

All Aboard for a Much-needed Weekend

Do you have that person in your life who always gets you, no matter what? The one who, because of similar experience and an upbringing that involved many of the same challenges is someone to whom you always look for advice or just to vent. That person for me is my cousin: technically a year younger than me but seeming older in many respects.

For our early life, really until mid-20s, we were never that far apart. Both of us are totally blind and have significant hearing loss due to a condition called Norrie Disease, so we have to work hard just to fit in to this world. We went to college together and lived in an apartment (albeit a slum) for six years.

Then life rolled on, and we were both fortunate to marry wonderful women. That has though necessitated changes in our relationship, as is common for all adults really. Now, we usually see each other maybe three or four times a year (with the time from January of 2020 till May of 2022 being the longest we didn’t get to spend time together due to Covid).

Anyhow, that’s slowly, finally, starting to change. This past weekend, as my work life ramps up and I feel increasingly nervous about my hearing challenges, I decided to see if we could just have a marathon Saturday watching sports and talking about nothing and everything as I like to do. My cousin and his wife agreed to allow my visit, so I purchased round-trip Amtrak tickets from Cary North Carolina to Charlotte.

I had to get the 5:43 Carolinian train, being fully aware of likely delays as it makes its way all the way down from New York City. And delays indeed happened, with emailed announcements throughout the day that the train was getting later and later.

I had Lyft take me over to the Cary station after a long day at work trying to hammer out the material for our upcoming Microsoft Excel workshop. The building was cold, and I found myself wishing I’d chosen to stay outside in the beautiful Fall-like weather to wait. I sat, snacking and reading, and tried to make myself take a break so all of my devices would make it onboard with a little life left.

The train finally arrived shortly before 7, and as I feared I was given an aisle seat so couldn’t plug in as easily. I always feel weird about asking my neighbor if I can stretch the cord over their legs.

The ride down was uneventful, and we arrived in Charlotte around 10. Knowing I would want to pick up food on the way to my cousin’s house, I decided to try downloading the Jack in the Box app to see if I could place an order in advance of getting there. I get Jack in the Box whenever I visit the Queen City, because we don’t have any of those in our area. And this would have worked, if I had already entered my payment method or at least set up Apple Pay. Trying to do that at the last minute just… didn’t work. Choosing the menu items I wanted though was accessible. Anyway, the driver just rolled me close enough to the Drive-through window to put in my order and I collected the food and headed to my cousin’s house. I do love this tech that makes it so much easier to independently move around and run errands.

Because it was already nearly Saturday by the time I finally arrived, we just stayed up a little while listening to the NFL game in Brazil and scarfing down the food. Then we retired for the night. I’d already understood that we would mostly be spending Saturday together anyway.

Knowing these folks wake by 8 AM, I was crawling out of bed just as the smell of bacon and eggs permeated the air. My cousin texted me, and I headed on down to sink my teeth into it. A small cup of orange juice and a big, piping hot mug of coffee completed the morning.

As far as sports go, our Alma mater UNC Charlotte (they call themselves Charlotte in the sports world) played, and were pretty much slapped around by, the North Carolina Tar Heels. Bowling Green University gave Penn State a scare, and number 5 Notre Dame were nipped by the Northern Illinois Huskies in an awesome upset. The prime-time game, North Carolina State University versus the University of Tennessee, was a bust as State were dragged all over Charlotte’s Bank of America Stadium.

While the games played, we chatted about our roles as Assistive Technology Specialists. We also noted the recent availability of high-powered, AI-driven Phonak Hearing Aids (NOTE: those may or may not be the right ones). Anyhow, I’m considering trying to get those, as they’re supposed to be really good at filtering out background noise. I have a hearing test (Oh fun! Except not), scheduled for September 18th, at which point I will begin this conversation with my audiologist. Where the money will come from for such a thing? Well… we shall see. No doubt I need it though, to help my rising career.

After our day of fun, we got food from a restaurant called the Skrimp Shack. (They mean Shrimp, but ok haha). I had a giant chicken “sammich” that I could not eat entirely, and a big styrofoam to-go plate of fries (the small is really small, the large is really large, no in-between). The food was really good, though.

And that was the crux of a great Saturday and weekend. I’m writing this as we speed back toward Cary on Sunday morning from 6:45 till 9:45. A bit of amusement: as we departed Charlotte, the conductor said we would be arriving in Cary, our next station stop, in 25 minutes. Cary takes three hours to reach, as suggested by the time I just posted, and it is not our next stop coming out of Charlotte. He meant a town called Kannapolis. I can only assume that it was too early in the morning for him, as it is for me of no or very little sleep. Although for some strange reason I feel hopped up on energy right now. Let’s hope that lasts till my Carolina Panthers (NFL) play the New Orleans Saints at 1, and hopefully start this season off right. You can’t get much worse than our 2-15 record the previous season. I do hope more of these restorative weekends are in store, and that you are able to find a way to lift your spirits when needed as well.

Reflections On An Age Milestone

As college football plays in the background (so glad it’s back!) I begin to feel celebratory. Hello, and welcome to September. What has happened to the summer? A smokin’ hot June, a flooded July and a mostly ambivalent August seem to have gone by in a blur. I enjoyed it, and thanks to remote work on Tuesdays and Thursdays I actually felt like I had a little taste of the old days, languishing on the floor as a kid.

Nevertheless, all of that will soon be behind us as we celebrate the last hurrah, Labor Day. Or should it be called Day-Off Day. And of course I know some folks must still work in order to keep the nuts and bolts of society going (I hope those of you to whom this applies at least get to have a day of relaxation there somewhere.)

The good news though (the really good news, admit it you think it’s good news) is that we’re now entering my birth month. Yup, here’s to all the Virgos, as my 45th birthday is on the 13th. Friday the 13th, oo scary. I think that’s only happened a handful of times for me. The one I most distinctly remember was in 1996, when a nice young woman who was in Chorus with me made me a braille card by folding a piece of paper several times so that it became thick and writing with her car keys. That’s the kind of gift one never forgets, just because of the thought and effort that went into making it. This year, we’re planning to go to a local restaurant called It’s A Southern Thing, where I will eat some of their delicious “Pete loaf,” some of the best meatloaf you’ve ever tasted invented by some guy named Pete I guess. I and my soon-to-be 45-year-old mind may have written about this place before but… whatever. It’s good! Kinda pricy and most consider it “Southern-inspired” rather than straight Southern. We ate there for our sixth anniversary.

Speaking of anniversaries, this past year of my life has been in many respects the best I’ve ever had. If you’re like me, and you might be, you have to remind yourself on occasion to step back and take stock of how good your life actually is. My overly perfectionistic tendencies can lead to undue stress as I do my work at work, training other blind folks so they can do what they want with their lives. I do believe that I’ve done better though this go-round, which also marks a completion of my second year at this level of employment as I officially started in this role on September 26 of 2022. I’m just getting more comfortable talking to people and going through my sessions, even when under supervision. And for me that comes with just taking a deep breath, focusing, and preparing as best I can. And being willing to ask questions of the participants, with the recognition that they have some thoughts about the direction they want things to go as well.

The coming weeks will actually be some of the biggest we as a department have experienced, as we get ready to launch an apparently popular set of live courses on Microsoft Excel. It’s after all something many of us need to use in our work situation but few of us really understand. I am certainly no expert either, but what I am is a quick learner who is working to quickly synthesize the information in a way that I hope others find helpful. We’ll see how it’s gone by this time in October.

And that’s pretty much what I’ve got. Still reading, I’m already into my 63rd book of the year! Let’s see if I can give you a cheat list of my top five books of this year so far:

  • Dust Child, by Nguyen Phan Que Mai
  • James, by Percival Everet
  • The Uncharted Flight of Olivia West, by Sara Ackerman
  • The Noumenon Series, by Marina Lostetter
  • Shelterwood, by Lisa Wingate

And yeah I added a whole series: sue me! It was good for reasons I’ve already detailed in here, namely that this author had folks with disabilities performing key roles on deep-space missions. Lots to talk about in the near future, as things really get oppin’. Well of the things I can disclose publicly, that is. More soon.

Book Review: Dust Child, by Nguyen Phan Que Mai

I’ve noticed recently a proliferation of books about the Vietnam war, most of them emotionally wrenching and thought-provoking. But this novel, which the author discloses at the end took nearly seven years to complete, tells a different story than we’re used to hearing.

It speaks of the American soldiers who, traumatized by war and feeling far away from home and the romantic partners they may have had there, often found “bar girls,” women they picked up in bars created for this purpose, and had sex with them among other things. Of course this resulted in children being born who often didn’t know their fathers, and in some cases didn’t know their mothers either.

These Amerasians as they were known, were ostracized from Vietnamese society and seen as the children of the enemy. They were doubly mistreated if their skin made it clear that their father had been African American.

The author explores all of these things in two characters who spend the novel searching. One, an American soldier who had wronged a Vietnamese bar girl with whom he had slept, wished to relocate her. The other searcher was a Vietnamese man who had been dropped off by his mother at an orphanage and was left to be raised by nuns. Wanting to take advantage of the Amerasian homestead Act, a real thing I’d not heard of by the way, he had tried repeatedly to be sent to the U.S. He understood that his chances would be better if he could locate his parents.

The book is powerful, filled with twists that leave the reader emotionally shaken but mentally more aware of the cost of this horrible war, not just for the Americans, as I, a U.S. citizen, very much understand, but to the Vietnamese as well. They still face challenges rought by the fighting and its aftermath. If you do read this, I would recommend listening to the audio, narrated by Quyen Ngo. She reads many novels set in Vietnam, and given the copious amount of Vietnamese in this book the audio will make it much easier to follow. Of course all of the things rendered in that language that require explanation for us English readers are explained, and Ngo adds a powerful element to the story with her portrayal of the characters and probable reactions to the scenes that play out (I’m thinking a few tears were shed).